"Hello from Commander Omega presently based on the Intergalactic Omega Universe starship, A C Clark, or as we call it, the I.O.U. A C Clark."

"We are presently parked in orbit on the dark side of the moon, above the crater Pink Floyd. We have finally decided to acknowledge our presence due to some errors in judgement on the part of some of my captains."

"I just finished watching the earth documentary that you guys made of that little fiasco last July 4th that Captain Wesley from the starship I.O.U. Hugo B, based on Mars, got himself into. He had never seen a flying animal and apologizes for over reacting. Your method of destroying his starship was ingenious. But, the only reason it worked was that against my orders, Captain Wesley installed that operating system he bought from some little earthling called, I believe, Bill or was it Bob Gates while on a trip to Earth. I believe it was called Windows 1995. We have since made sure that all I.O.U. Starships have purged Windows 1995 and re-installed our old operating system, The Doors 2001, created by International Banking Machines. Not only can it run the computers on our Starships, but it also gives change in our Blue currency."

"Now for the bad news. We originally constructed Earth for the highly intelligent Mice race. They wanted to conduct experiments on human behaviour. Their contract has been renewed every century, but they have let it be known that they will not be renewing it for the next century. This is due to protests amongst the Mice race against conducting tests on Human subjects when the same results can be performed with computer models, and you do not have to clean up after a computer model. We tried to tell them that Humans were not as dumb as they looked, but as you probably have guessed, they just laughed."

"We will be throwing the switch on earths core on the completion of the Mice contract at the 7th minute of the 7th hour of the 7th day of the 7th month of the year 1999 and then its lights out. The good news is that we are working on an evacuation plan and sorry its not called Hale Bopp. Click on the FORWARD triangle below if you want more information on the evacuation plan.

The Web-Counter transporter logs indicate that you are the life-form to beam into the Omega Universe since May 1st, 1996.